Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
