we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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