he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
