Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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