THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
