you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize