Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize