I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
