i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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