I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
