Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Randomize
