alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I stole a fireplace last night.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
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