Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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