pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
