After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
there was a trapeze. enough said
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
