So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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