actually, I'm a sock model
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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