Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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