Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Randomize
