evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
