When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize