her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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