why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
