Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
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