i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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