Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize