Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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