I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Found the puke drawer
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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