There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Operation Purity has been aborted
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize