I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
