Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Randomize
