i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
