Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
