No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
