Banned from zoo.
Again?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I love you. Go after that dick
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
