That's intense
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
