just tell him i said nine months
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
