is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
