The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I think I won the penis lottery.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
