so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
