Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
