Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
