Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
need another drink. this is the easiest way
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
