But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Rumble strips road head = magical
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
