New low: just hacked my moms facebook
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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