I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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