chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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