My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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