she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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