around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
