Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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